Comparing the old with the new?

Hey to all reading this,

I was at a party this weekend to celebrate not only my but also three of my friends birthdays…

But that is not what I am blogging about today. It was something that was said at the party that had me thinking. Do people compare their previous partner with there recent one and is there a possibility that people have a dating preference, like the check list but subconsciously.

My friend Anika and I talked about it for quite sometime that night and we came to the conclusion that there are patterns. Like I only dated guys that has a C in his name or begins with it. Where she finds guys attractive that has a h in there name. (Crush on them) and it is all subconscious as if your brain wants to find that letter and make a spark. kinds-of-lovers-300

Could it be that we have stumbled onto something that changes who we choose. So what does this mean? We have got to the point to say okay maybe this could be linked. What are odds that there is always the same letter in the name or that starts with it? one out of a billion right. So it can be, or can it? Can there be a pattern, making you choose one letter from the alphabet and that is search by your brain in the name and surname to feel more attracted to a person?

What if it is possible? you mind works hard and helps your heart to choose the right person. By taking a letter and making it a plus in the blood rising and tingles in your stomach?

I don’t know but am trying to find out.

Now I am baffled by all the info storming in my head from the total possible patterns that one person can have. The possible combinations and patterns that your brain can follow to choosing the right partner for you.

First one is the overall looks….ceac6c183be5c7e99d7457544612db26

You can deny it as much as you want but in the looks department everybody wants something that will attract them to their other half. And this list can be endless. (some want a Barbie or Ken looking person. Perfect on the outside.)

That list you made of the perfect man/woman.

Hair….. that what color, length, style etc.

Body…. type, shape, skin, length etc.

eyes, ears, mouth, nose, etc.

(Can you see the pattern here be it that the only thing resembling the previous partner may be eyes or hands but the fiscal pattern is as clear as daylight. be it like that guy only dates blonds or girls with tanned skin.)

But unfortunately we all have flaws, be it acne or one extra toe. Even thought it has that perfect vision of the perfect person you  might only get 80 or 20 percent of what you want. So you can’t get a hundred score here but does this  pattern not lean on the might date again cause you have got the looks I want in a partner but not the personality.

Personality pattern…..17rbhix1kqss5jpg

There are numerous things that can attract someone to your personality. Like you have the fun and loving personality that more can relate to than being shy and withdrawn but that is not all you have to show. People are socialists and for that to be satisfied we interact as a way to nurse our curiosity and fill the empty spaces made for others in our life.

(Can that be that people can only fall for what that person is on the inside or is it just a myth now that personality is everything.)

But the pattern is there even in the smallest way it is. Dating different people that either have a short temper or kindness in common. Do you really know what kind of personality you like? Is it enough?

Now what we have two persons. One with the looks and the other has the personality. Witch do you choose?


This is only a few options of patterns that I have gone through. Like the letter or name of a person there is the months or numbers (date or birth year or even age) another study that can be thrown into the batch.

What is the month that has the most of your ex – partners in it. be it anniversary or birthday or when you met. think about it? could this be another pattern we use to meat the one.Calendar_0Now there is one pattern that I know some people have used more than anything. Star sign compatibility. You might think o yes that has been more than effective for thousands of couples over the years but is it really as effective that you can find your partner. So the great search begins. can any of these help with finding the one?


So I am testing my own thing here and got the following conclusion ( TAKE NOTE THAT EVERYTHING HAS BEEN CALCULATED TO MY PAST RELATIONSHIPS  AND CRUSHES)

Letter assosiated with more than 60% of guys I have dated?         C

Body type etc – looks (my preferences)?         lean, brown hair, hazel brown eyes, sexy hands etc.

Comparison to the looks  _ Lean and brown hair

Personality?  Fun, loving, extrovert, artist, talkative etc

Comparison to the personality?  Fun, extrovert and artist.

Month in common?  March – either started dating or their birthday was then

Number?  Only pattern  that had me thinking. what did it have and the nr 3 came forward.

Star sign compatibility….. Pisces and Aries

Now thrown together will it be a way to get the perfect match?url

The pattern becomes more and more complicated when throw together and the possible outcomes are endless.

Might this be an endless search or are we on to discovering a way to make many lives easier?



One response to “Comparing the old with the new?

  1. Very interesting if it is the same ‘checklist’ you and Anika chose and it worked that way for both of you. I am assuming that she is also straight. My experience is somewhat different, but then again it could be the different dynamics in my types of relationships throughout my history: With men* my relationships were unsure, I was uncomfortable and in my mind it worked only because of the social convention of the era I grew up in. With women it was the other way around. I am confident, have a general feeling of security, closeness and comfort and I am myself. Female to female relationships (romantically) works dynamically different that any straight relationship, so I think that how we ‘choose’ someone is also different. Marli, you know me and most of my history, but for the clarity of the other followers let me elaborate quickly. *…no, I am not indecisive, I just had to follow social convention until I could finally tumble out of the closet!

    Male (date or serious crush) from most recent: (all fair-skinned)
    Jannie, – Short, blonde, green eyes, musical, caring, sensitive, bubbly
    Bennie, – Muscular (more beefy LOL), blonde, blue eyes, ‘boerseun’, cook, a man of
    few words
    Willem, – Lean, tall, brown hair and eyes, loved speeding and rap, was terminally ill,
    had power with words
    Pieter, – (crush only) Average height, stocky build, blue eyes, quiet, shy
    Francois, – Tall, lean, wavy brown hair, dark brown eyes, gentle, caring, sensitive
    Franco. – Short, blonde, blue or green eyes?, crazy, funny, spontaneous, loud, bubbly

    Female (date or serious crush) from most recent:
    Jaricka, – long blonde curls, green eyes, average built, tall, musical, silent observer, moody, fair-skinned, dark side, loud, caring, artistic, extrovert
    (Carien), –
    Elizabeth, – tanned, black eyes, dark brown long curly hair, quiet, secretive, short, average-to-rounded build, dark side, silent observer, introvert
    Carien, – tanned, dark long hair, green-brown eyes, average height, dark side, silent observer, introvert
    Can’t-remember-her-name-just-her-face, – sporty, short, short spiked dark brown hair, green eyes, boyish charms, typical SA lesbian look, confident, observer, Introvert
    Alicia, – sporty build, tall, long blonde hair, blue eyes, soft voice, shy, introvert
    Riëtte, – Average height, sporty-stocky build, brown short hair, blue eyes?, strong voice (don’t know if it’s musical or not), secretive, quiet, introvert
    Natalie, – Tall, light brown hair, brown eyes, lean build, shy, quiet, introvert
    Can’t-say-M, – bubbly, short, long blonde semi-curly hair, blue eyes, caring, confident, sporty build, extrovert
    Can’t-say-J, – Tall-ish, blonde curls, blue eyes, a-little-extra build, bubbly with friends, quiet and shy with strangers, introvert
    Mariëtte. – short, blonde curls, blue eyes, rolling R’s a lot, confident, loud, extrovert.

    Okay, let’s see what this theory brings forward in my case.

    Letter associated with more than 60% of the men I have dated or crushed on? None, however I do pick up that ALL of them (even non-serious dating) has 2 syllables.

    Body type etc – looks (my preferences)? Tanned, sun-streaked hair, multicolored

    Comparison to the looks _ None

    Personality? Understanding, introvert, artistic

    Comparison to the personality? Not enough to mention

    Month in common? None (Sept, Dec, March, May, Nov)

    Number? None that I can connect

    Star sign compatibility….. (No idea)


    Letter associated with more than 60% of the women I have dated or crushed on? None – they’re different letters, syllables, origins, languages.

    Body type etc – looks (my preferences)? Sporty / a-little-more, Dark hair, Green

    Comparison to the looks Sporty / a-little-more, Green eyes

    Personality? Understanding, introvert, artistic

    Comparison to the personality? Understanding, most were introverts

    Month in common? None (Sept, Dec, March, Feb, Nov, Jan)

    Number? None that I can connect

    Star sign compatibility….. (No idea)

    Maybe you can make more sense of this than me, work out the common denominator here… But like I said, maybe my comparisons are off because of the differences between normal straight relationships and mine.

    I think you have something here, maybe set up a survey for all your friends and even followers to get a wide spectrum of results.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s